Post image for VENOM NOM NOM: Cookie Monster Bonded With Venom Symbiote

My friend Marty’s mom is so f*cked. She is essentially a cookie samurai, and after ^this guy gets wind of it she’s gonna be churning out flesh cookies for eternity. Delicious flesh cookies.

Have fun not sleeping, like ever.

[ carltheshivan | reddit ]

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Ah, I just love when someone else vindicates my hatred for something I’ve never seen or read and is based entirely upon its moronic fan base. Doesn’t happen often, but when it does I almost feel like chest bumping somebody, but I don’t because having to look that person in the eyes knowing what had just transpired seconds prior would be absolutely terrible.

Alex Reads Twilight, reads Twilight points out how just about every word is completely stupid, which is just great.

[ youtube ]

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Post image for Planet X-Press Men: Futurama/X-men Mashup

Thanks to Deviantartist gottabecarl, Everyone in Futurama looks like they’ve been dipping their bottoms over and over into a mutagenic X-men bubble bath of the silkiest oils and creams:

A friend of mine suggested one day that it would be cool to see the characters of Futurama as X-Men and so I drew him Fry as Cyclops. For some reason I couldn’t just stop there…and what came of it was a pretty extensive illustration with some of the most obscure characters from both the X-Men and Futurama universes

[ gottabecarl's deviantart | io9 ]

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Post image for WTFan-art: Superman Busted A Baby Up In Batman

“Meanwhile, on Maury: Aqua Man, You are NOT the father.”
[ reddit ]

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Post image for You Guys Fap It Way More Than I Thought, Not That I’ve Ever Thought About You Fapping

Here’s an extra disturbing infographic to show you the absurd frequency with which internet users touch themselves. One factoid of particular interest is that the average porn site visit is 6 minutes and 29 seconds. Ha! That’s three times longer than normal. Losers.

Full pornograph after the jump
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Roger Linn, inventor of the first drum machine and all around musical genius I suspect has been involved in shady dealings with the robodevil for 30 plus years, reveals an early prototype in the above video for a new instrument tentatively titled the ‘LinnStrument’:

If you’ve read my New Musical Instruments page, you know that I’m interested in the idea of new musical instruments that overcome the limitations of traditional mechanical instruments. My particular interest is in a new instrument that while capable of entirely new sounds and playing techniques, is also able to reproduce the sounds, virtuosic performance capabilities and subtleties that we’ve come to know and love from traditional musical instruments, but without all their problems and limitations.

And the result is a very fluid sound that is exactly like the digiflute of seduction my robo space-fairy girlfriend plays all the time in my erotic Asimovian fan fiction.

[ sonicstate ]

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Post image for Hey Look At This Crazy Fence Graffiti

This optical illusiony fence graffiti in Berlin by MENTALGASSI renders all other fencing invalid, with the exception of penis fencing, EN GARDE! Yeah you better run. I’m like Sulu with this thing.

[ reddit ]

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I can’t imagine Neil Tyson doesn’t regret to this day that he didn’t lie about the bus not being able to get through, ’cause uh, Carl Sagan slumber party ftw.

Sagan was a man much too great for this pale blue dot.

[ youtube ]

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Bionic Handjob? From The Future Is Here

Thumbnail image for Bionic Hand<strike>job?</strike> From The Future Is Here

Terminator tech seems to have begun seeping through cracks in time from the future as scientists in Britain have developed a cutting-edge Vader claw with fingers that move and react independently, based on interpreted muscle signals from the remains of the hand or stump: It is the first of its kind, treating each multi-jointed finger [...]

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7 Minutes In ‘Whoa, Like, Your Face Is Morphing, Mannn’ Heaven

This psychedelic high speed face-morphing animation by Andreas Hykade is completely awesome, plus if you’re anything like me you’re hunting shape-shifters and you need to do everything you can to keep your temporal lobe on its toes in terms of facial recognition, otherwise your mind isn’t quick enough to notice the shift. Yes, each part [...]

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